# Cult of the Dead Cow: How the Original Hacking Supergroup Might Just Save the World ## Chapter 3: The Cons Barlow’s introduction to the rougher side of the internet came in late 1989, when he participated in a WELL group chat about the nature of hacking that was curated by Harper’s magazine, which printed excerpts. Among those typing in facts and opinions over the course of a week were open-source software crusader Richard Stallman, 2600 editor Eric Corley (under his post-indictment handle, Emmanuel Goldstein), and Cliff Stoll, the Berkeley astronomer who had traced hackers working for Russia and chronicled the work in his book The Cuckoo’s Egg. Most of the drama came from two brash young New York hackers identifying themselves as Acid Phreak and Phiber Optik. *[3/17/26 7:57 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/476/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/22/2/4/2/2%5Bchapter003%5D/34/1%3A0%29)* -------------------- they showed the court, the press, and the public the major flaws in the case, eventually including the devastating fact that the same information in the manual that BellSouth valued at $79,000 could be openly bought for $13. *[3/27/26 9:11 AM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/476/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/22/2/4/2/2%5Bchapter003%5D/40/1%3A484%29)* -------------------- # Deliver Us From Evil ## Part Three: And the Darkness He Called Night ### 12 ‘Insight is when you make something yourself, from scratch. Opinion is when you buy it at the store.”’ *[2/19/26 8:41 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/667/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/92/2/4%5BChildren_of_the_Dragon_ebook-42%5D/2/12/1%3A1060%29)* -------------------- # Surfing on the Internet: a nethead's adventures on-line ## pRocRAStinAtion rEVElatIoN It reads like some wacked-out librarian has taken a few hits of crystal meth, decided that computer languages, television, fan clubs, and sex—in that order—are the essential human pursuits, and overhauled the Dewey decimal system accordingly. *[2/19/26 7:30 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/665/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/12/2/4/2/8/1%3A529%29)* -------------------- ## dIGitAl YouTH In fact, few things rattle the tech-sawy Net community more than all this talk of corporations and Uncle Sam "improving" the Internet. *[2/19/26 8:25 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/665/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/56/2/4/2/32/1%3A0%29)* -------------------- Making the place idiot-proof just guarantees that more idiots will use it. Great. Now that would cure my Net habit. *[2/19/26 8:25 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/665/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/56/2/4/2/32/1%3A426%29)* -------------------- ## ThE OnlIne INternEt adDictS' SuPpOrt gROup It's a classic pot-and-kettle situation. Usenet news worms look down on IRC junkies look down on MUD-heads look down on people who MUD more than them. *[2/19/26 8:22 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/665/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/70/2/4/2/48/1%3A0%29)* -------------------- Yes, I realize that it's an oxymoron to hash out my Net habit in an online forum. But at least the people here know what I'm talking about, *[2/19/26 8:22 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/665/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/70/2/4/2/52/1%3A0%29)* -------------------- "Please tell me all the clocks are wrong and it isn't really 4:30 AM and I haven't been on for 3 days straight........." *[2/19/26 8:14 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/665/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/70/2/4/2/94/1%3A0%29)* -------------------- Log off. Go to fridge and open it in hopes of seeing that something new and zany has spontaneously materialized. It hasn't. Go back to computer and log on in hopes that something new and zany has spontaneously materialized. It has. *[2/19/26 8:14 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/665/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/70/2/4/2/106/1%3A0%29)* -------------------- # ADHD Is Awesome: A Guide to (Mostly) Thriving With ADHD ## Part 1: Getting to Know ADHD ### Chapter 1 ADHD 101 if you have ADHD, you may be better at focusing than your neurotypical friends, as long as you’re actually interested in what you’re doing. *[2/9/26 6:50 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/598/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/28/2/4/2/16/2/1%3A9%29)* -------------------- there is a hereditary component to ADHD’s biological origins. Scientists have identified seven genes and a few dozen locations on the genome that seem to be involved with the disorder, which means ADHD tends to run in families. Chances are good you have at least one relative with the condition as well. *[2/9/26 6:53 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/598/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/28/2/4/2/34/1%3A58%29)* -------------------- Many people don’t get diagnosed until college when the deadlines, independence, and pressure lead to a greater presentation of symptoms. *[2/9/26 6:55 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/598/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/28/2/4/2/70/2%3A162%29)* -------------------- ADHD pairs frequently with depression and anxiety, so teasing out what is ADHD and what is another disorder can be difficult. *[2/9/26 6:56 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/598/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/28/2/4/2/76/2%3A1%29)* -------------------- ### Chapter 2 The Big D—Diagnosing ADHD Sitting in large auditoriums with one person talking at me for two hours with no back-and-forth of any kind was my idea of hell. *[2/9/26 7:00 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/598/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/30/2/4/2/18/1%3A156%29)* -------------------- ### Chapter 3 Inside the ADHD Brain The ADHD inner CEO is simply not as loud and bossy as a neurotypical person’s *[2/15/26 6:13 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/598/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/32/2/4/2/52/1%3A0%29)* -------------------- The flip side of the coin is that your creativity flows freely without a micromanager slowing you down. *[2/15/26 6:13 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/598/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/32/2/4/2/52/1%3A213%29)* -------------------- Things that help charge your battery? Sleep, nutrition, connection, meditation, and exercise. For some people, medication also helps. *[2/15/26 6:15 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/598/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/32/2/4/2/68/1%3A617%29)* -------------------- There are four main categories your brain has trouble regulating: impulses, activity, emotions, and attention. *[2/15/26 6:19 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/598/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/32/2/4/2/86/1%3A0%29)* -------------------- “What we have is an abundance of attention, the very opposite of a deficit problem. Our challenge is to control it.” *[2/15/26 6:22 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/598/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/32/2/4/2/120/2/1%3A0%29)* -------------------- The ADHD brain is not terrible at paying attention. It’s terrible at choosing what to pay attention to. *[2/15/26 6:24 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/598/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/32/2/4/2/126/4/1%3A0%29)* -------------------- if something is interesting, a person with ADHD can lock in and absorb information extremely efficiently. *[2/15/26 6:31 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/598/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/32/2/4/2/152/2%5Bpage_41%5D%3A248%29)* -------------------- The feeling of boredom is physically uncomfortable. *[2/15/26 6:33 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/598/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/32/2/4/2/154/2/1%3A61%29)* -------------------- While the typical understanding of ADHD suggests that people who have it are overstimulated, the ADHD brain is actually chronically understimulated. *[2/15/26 6:38 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/598/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/32/2/4/2/166/1%3A198%29)* -------------------- # Different Seasons ## SUMMER OF CORRUPTION ### Apt Pupil #### 1 The banker who bought them for me went to jail for murdering his wife a year after I bought them... life is sometimes strange, boy, hein?” *[2/12/26 9:17 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/75/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/26/2/4/324/1%3A271%29)* Andy Dufresne! -------------------- #### 8 Todd is a very apt pupil, *[2/14/26 3:45 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/75/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/40/2/4/64/1%3A6%29)* He said the title! -------------------- # The Nerdist Way: How to Reach the Next Level (In Real Life) ## PART ONE - MIND ### RPG YOUR LIFE If your brain feels soupy, it may be because you’ve been carrying around too much crap in it so it’s important to pull that out onto the paper and into the physical world. *[2/1/26 8:07 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/664/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/20/2/4/24/1%3A324%29)* -------------------- por esample *[2/1/26 8:13 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/664/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/20/2/4/38/1%3A411%29)* for example -------------------- Chaotic Good, is synonymous with “the lovable rebel.” The characters are drawn toward a greater good, but have little care for any political authority unless it gibes with their own agenda. In fact, they may tend to buck authority just because they don’t like the idea of being under someone’s thumb. *[2/1/26 8:17 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/664/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/20/2/4/66/1%3A36%29)* -------------------- ### SEIZE YOUR INNER MONOLOGUE It’s human nature to attach reasoning to events in an attempt to understand an otherwise reasonless world, no matter how ridiculous. (AHEMreligionAHEM *[2/1/26 8:24 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/664/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/22/2/4/16/1%3A727%29)* -------------------- Look, good things happen and bad things happen. They’re usually not connected in some kind of unholy marriage of crap. *[2/2/26 2:34 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/664/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/22/2/4/26/1%3A384%29)* -------------------- ### CHOO-CHOO-CHOOOOOSING It’s about feeling like you have options. Whenever you have at least one other option in life, you feel relaxed, safe, and cool because if the one thing doesn’t work out, you’re not going to die. *[2/12/26 8:23 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/664/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/24/2/4/64/2/1%3A0%29)* -------------------- It’s kind of a cold economy of nature to reward those who don’t seem to need it. I think it stems from the idea that if an organism is strong, it’s worthy of passing on its genes. If said organism is desperate and needy, it must be flawed and its spreading must be limited. *[2/12/26 8:27 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/664/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/24/2/4/84/1%3A418%29)* -------------------- # Raising Hell: A Concise History of the Black Arts - and Those Who Dared to Practice Them ## I. Black Magic and Sorcery ### The Magus TO KNOW, TO DARE, TO WILL, TO KEEP SILENCE—such are the four words of the magus. *[2/2/26 3:29 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/28/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/18/2/4/2%5Bch_01.1%5D/18/1%3A445%29)* -------------------- # Beating Cancer With Nutrition: Clinically Proven and Easy-To-Follow Strategies to Dramatically Improve Your Quality and Quantity of Life and Increase Chances for a Complete Remission ## Shortcut: If you are too sick to read much, then read this Focus on the parts of your body that are working properly, not on the cancer. *[1/26/26 9:50 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/661/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/16/2/4/10/1%3A0%29)* -------------------- People beat cancer all the time. But fear of death is not a reason to live. *[1/26/26 9:51 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/661/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/16/2/4/28/2%3A71%29)* -------------------- Do not rely on any “magic bullet” nutrient to beat your cancer. There are no such things. Your body needs the 50 recognized essential nutrients plus a couple of hundred other valuable nutrients that can only be found in a wholesome diet that is supplemented with the right nutrients. *[1/26/26 9:52 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/661/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/16/2/4/52/1%3A179%29)* -------------------- Cancer is a sugar-feeder. The scientists call it an “obligate glucose metabolizer”. You can slow cancer growth by lowering the amount of fuel available to the tumor cells. *[1/26/26 9:53 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/661/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/16/2/4/58/1%3A0%29)* -------------------- Cancer generates chemicals that lower appetite while increasing calorie needs. The net effect is that many cancer patients begin to lose weight. You cannot fight a life-threatening disease while malnourished. *[1/26/26 9:53 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/661/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/16/2/4/66/1%3A110%29)* -------------------- Eat foods in as close to their natural state as is possible. Eat as much colorful vegetables as your colon can tolerate. If a food will not rot or sprout, then throw it out. *[1/26/26 9:56 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/661/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/16/2/4/86/2%3A1%29)* -------------------- Healthy fats line the cell membranes and help to lower blood glucose by making insulin more effective. Healthy fats make the immune cells more likely to recognize and destroy cancer cells. *[1/26/26 9:58 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/661/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/16/2/4/118/1%3A128%29)* -------------------- ## Section One, THE PROBLEM: losing the war on cancer ### 2-What causes cancer? What if the first thing I do every morning when I arrive at my office is to slam my thumb in the desk drawer. *[1/26/26 9:35 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/661/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/22/2/4/36/1%3A33%29)* -------------------- It was Norman Cousins’ book, ANATOMY OF AN ILLNESS *[1/26/26 9:44 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/661/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/22/2/4/64/1%3A186%29)* -------------------- Since the mind can create cancer, it should seem a logical leap that the mind can help to prevent and even subdue cancer. *[1/26/26 9:45 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/661/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/22/2/4/66/1%3A799%29)* -------------------- Kenneth Pelletier, MD, PhD, wrote his groundbreaking book, MIND AS HEALER, MIND AS SLAYER *[1/26/26 9:46 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/661/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/22/2/4/66/1%3A999%29)* -------------------- Humans evolved as active creatures. Inactivity is an abnormal, under-oxygenated metabolic state--so is cancer. *[1/26/26 9:49 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/661/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/22/2/4/80/1%3A312%29)* -------------------- ## Section Two, The Solution: aggressive nutrition ### 8-Malnutrition among cancer patients The human body is incredibly resilient, which sometimes works to our disadvantage. No one dies on the first cigarette inhaled, or the first drunken evening, or the first decade of unhealthy eating. We misconstrue the fact that we survived this ordeal to mean we can do it forever. Not so. *[1/27/26 2:04 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/661/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/34/2/4/62/1%3A0%29)* -------------------- There is some evidence that tumors are not as flexible as healthy host tissue in using fuel. A low carbohydrate parenteral formula may have the ability to slow down tumor growth by selectively starving the cancer cells. *[1/27/26 2:07 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/661/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/34/2/4/84/1%3A0%29)* -------------------- ### 10-Improving immune functions When the doctor says “We think we got it all,” what he or she is really saying is “We have destroyed all DETECTABLE cancer cells, and now it is up to your immune system to find and destroy the cancer cells that inevitably remain in your body.” *[1/30/26 10:37 AM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/661/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/38/2/4/16/1%3A0%29)* -------------------- # 1984 ## PART I ### I - I The horrible thing about the Two Minutes Hate was not that one was obliged to act a part, but that it was impossible to avoid joining in. *[1/19/26 8:22 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/442/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/14/2/4/78/1%3A887%29)* -------------------- Better than before, moreover, he realized why it was that he hated her. He hated her because she was young and pretty and sexless, because he wanted to go to bed with her and would never do so, because round her sweet supple waist, which seemed to ask you to encircle it with your arm, there was only the odious scarlet sash, aggressive symbol of chastity. *[1/19/26 8:22 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/442/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/14/2/4/80/1%3A574%29)* -------------------- ### I - II he had dreamed that he was walking through a pitch-dark room. And someone sitting to one side of him had said as he passed: ‘We shall meet in the place where there is no darkness.’ *[1/19/26 8:22 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/442/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/16/2/4%5B5N3C0-009a374c03ed451193eafc2155bedd64%5D/66/1%3A50%29)* -------------------- Asleep or awake, working or eating, indoors or out of doors, in the bath or in bed—no escape. Nothing was your own except the few cubic centimetres inside your skull. *[1/19/26 8:22 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/442/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/16/2/4%5B5N3C0-009a374c03ed451193eafc2155bedd64%5D/88/1%3A403%29)* -------------------- ### I - III Actually, as Winston well knew, it was only four years since Oceania had been at war with Eastasia and in alliance with Eurasia. But that was merely a piece of furtive knowledge which he happened to possess because his memory was not satisfactorily under control. *[1/19/26 8:22 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/442/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/18/2/4%5B6LJU0-009a374c03ed451193eafc2155bedd64%5D/42/1%3A747%29)* -------------------- if all others accepted the lie which the Party imposed—if all records told the same tale—then the lie passed into history and became truth. *[1/19/26 8:22 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/442/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/18/2/4%5B6LJU0-009a374c03ed451193eafc2155bedd64%5D/46/1%3A290%29)* -------------------- It was not true, for example, as was claimed in the Party history books, that the Party had invented aeroplanes. He remembered aeroplanes since his earliest childhood. But you could prove nothing. There was never any evidence. *[1/19/26 8:22 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/442/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/18/2/4%5B6LJU0-009a374c03ed451193eafc2155bedd64%5D/56/1%3A1444%29)* -------------------- ### I - IV Day by day and almost minute by minute the past was brought up to date. In this way every prediction made by the Party could be shown by documentary evidence to have been correct; *[1/19/26 8:22 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/442/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/20/2/4%5B7K4G0-009a374c03ed451193eafc2155bedd64%5D/28/1%3A670%29)* -------------------- Very likely no boots had been produced at all. Likelier still, nobody knew how many had been produced, much less cared. All one knew was that every quarter astronomical numbers of boots were produced on paper, while perhaps half the population of Oceania went barefoot. *[1/19/26 8:23 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/442/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/20/2/4%5B7K4G0-009a374c03ed451193eafc2155bedd64%5D/30/1%3A996%29)* -------------------- ### I - V It appeared that there had even been demonstrations to thank Big Brother for raising the chocolate ration to twenty grammes a week. And only yesterday, he reflected, it had been announced that the ration was to be reduced to twenty grammes a week. Was it possible that they could swallow that, after only twenty-four hours? Yes, they swallowed it. Parsons swallowed it easily, with the stupidity of an animal. *[1/19/26 8:23 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/442/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/22/2/4%5B8IL20-009a374c03ed451193eafc2155bedd64%5D/124/1%3A823%29)* -------------------- ### I - VII If there is hope, wrote Winston, it lies in the proles. *[1/19/26 8:23 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/442/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/26/2/4/6/2/1%3A0%29)* -------------------- But the proles, if only they could somehow become conscious of their own strength, would have no need to conspire. They needed only to rise up and shake themselves like a horse shaking off flies. *[1/19/26 8:23 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/442/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/26/2/4/8/1%3A622%29)* -------------------- In the end the Party would announce that two and two made five, and you would have to believe it. It was inevitable that they should make that claim sooner or later: the logic of their position demanded it. *[1/19/26 8:23 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/442/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/26/2/4/86/1%3A386%29)* -------------------- The Party told you to reject the evidence of your eyes and ears. It was their final, most essential command. *[1/19/26 8:23 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/442/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/26/2/4/92/1%3A0%29)* -------------------- Freedom is the freedom to say that two plus two make four. If that is granted, all else follows. *[1/19/26 8:23 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/442/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/26/2/4/96/2/1%3A0%29)* -------------------- ## PART II ### II - III If you kept the small rules you could break the big ones. *[1/20/26 3:37 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/442/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/36/2/4%5BF8900-009a374c03ed451193eafc2155bedd64%5D/16/1%3A782%29)* -------------------- ### II - IV ‘I bet that picture’s got bugs behind it,’ said Julia. ‘I’ll take it down and give it a good clean some day. *[1/20/26 3:58 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/442/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/38/2/4%5BG6PI0-009a374c03ed451193eafc2155bedd64%5D/162/1%3A0%29)* If they only knew... -------------------- ### II - IX The speech had been proceeding for perhaps twenty minutes when a messenger hurried onto the platform and a scrap of paper was slipped into the speaker’s hand. He unrolled and read it without pausing in his speech. Nothing altered in his voice or manner, or in the content of what he was saying, but suddenly the names were different. Without words said, a wave of understanding rippled through the crowd. Oceania was at war with Eastasia! The next moment there was a tremendous commotion. The banners and posters with which the square was decorated were all wrong! Quite half of them had the wrong faces on them. It was sabotage! The agents of Goldstein had been at work! There was a riotous interlude while posters were ripped from the walls, banners torn to shreds and trampled underfoot. *[1/20/26 4:50 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/442/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/48/2/4%5BKVCC0-009a374c03ed451193eafc2155bedd64%5D/12/1%3A1473%29)* -------------------- ### II - X ‘We are the dead,’ he said. ‘We are the dead,’ echoed Julia dutifully. ‘You are the dead,’ said an iron voice behind them. *[1/21/26 6:24 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/442/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/50/2/4%5BLTSU0-009a374c03ed451193eafc2155bedd64%5D/46/1%3A0%29)* -------------------- ## PART III ### III - III What can you do, thought Winston, against the lunatic who is more intelligent than yourself, who gives your arguments a fair hearing and then simply persists in his lunacy? *[1/25/26 4:41 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/442/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/58/2/4%5BPNV60-009a374c03ed451193eafc2155bedd64%5D/22/1%3A1271%29)* I'd argue that the lunatic is not more intelligent. Only more stubborn. -------------------- If you want a picture of the future, imagine a boot stamping on a human face—for ever.’ *[1/25/26 4:47 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/442/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/58/2/4%5BPNV60-009a374c03ed451193eafc2155bedd64%5D/82/1%3A2217%29)* -------------------- ### III - IV To die hating them, that was freedom. *[1/25/26 7:28 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/442/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/60/2/4/72/1%3A821%29)* -------------------- # The PARA Method: Simplify, Organize, and Master Your Digital Life ## Part II: The PARA Playbook ### Chapter 9: Keep Information Flowing The only action I recommend avoiding at all costs is duplication: you never want to have two versions of a file or document, because then you never know which one is the most current. *[3/30/24 4:13 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/587/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/128/2/4/2/22/1%3A0%29)* -------------------- ## Part III: Deep Dives ### Chapter 12: The Three Core Habits of Organization Instead of spending a lot of effort organizing your digital information “just in case” you need it someday, wait until your needs become crystal clear and then organize your notes and files “just in time” for the project you’re working on right now. *[1/1/26 3:01 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/587/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/168/2/4/30/1%3A0%29)* -------------------- Highly precise systems require a lot of effort to maintain, which means most aspects of your digital world should remain loose and informal by default. *[1/1/26 3:01 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/587/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/168/2/4/36/1%3A158%29)* -------------------- Allowing some messiness and randomness into the system creates opportunities for very different ideas to be connected and intermixed. *[1/1/26 3:02 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/587/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/168/2/4/40/1%3A174%29)* -------------------- ### Chapter 13: Using PARA to Enhance Focus, Creativity, and Perspective Collecting information is easy, and we’ve seen that filing it away isn’t that hard either. But if you stop there, all this effort amounts to hoarding. *[1/4/26 2:01 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/587/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/176/2/4/2/10/6/1%3A0%29)* -------------------- Which projects are most active right now? Which tasks are most time-sensitive? What are the next steps you need to take to move them forward? What information do you need access to in order to do so? *[1/4/26 2:04 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/587/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/180/2/4/6/16/2/1%3A0%29)* -------------------- ### Chapter 15: Organizing as Personal Growth Knowledge has been commoditized and made universally accessible, first through search engines and now through increasingly advanced artificial intelligence. Which means there is no advantage to knowing any particular piece of knowledge anymore. *[1/10/26 10:32 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/587/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/200/2/4/2/6/1%3A112%29)* -------------------- # The Mindful Geek: Secular Meditation for Smart Skeptics ## First Practice mindfulness meditation is not about attempting to create a particular state of mind or body. If you are tense or in pain (and there’s nothing you can do about it currently), then just allow that to happen and accept it. *[12/29/25 10:51 AM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/326/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/32/2/4%5B7K4G0-04ed0e0eceb9449db19c53606abb99e8%5D/2/6/1%3A14%29)* -------------------- if you’re not feeling particularly accepting, that’s OK, too. Accept that you can’t accept it. And the flipside is important, too: if you find that you are judging things that happen in the meditation, try not to judge yourself for judging. *[12/29/25 10:52 AM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/326/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/32/2/4%5B7K4G0-04ed0e0eceb9449db19c53606abb99e8%5D/2/6/1%3A464%29)* -------------------- A more likely guess is that we, along with all mammals, evolved to explore our environment and continuously scan for new threats and opportunities. The brain just likes to be busy. *[12/29/25 10:55 AM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/326/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/34/2/4%5B7K4G0-04ed0e0eceb9449db19c53606abb99e8%5D/2/14/1%3A625%29)* -------------------- Focused attention was strongly correlated with feeling happy, whereas having a wandering mind was usually accompanied by unpleasant feelings. *[12/29/25 10:57 AM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/326/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/34/2/4%5B7K4G0-04ed0e0eceb9449db19c53606abb99e8%5D/2/22/1%3A248%29)* -------------------- There are many ways of feeling better, but one of the most powerful is simply to concentrate on what you are doing in the moment. *[12/29/25 10:57 AM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/326/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/34/2/4%5B7K4G0-04ed0e0eceb9449db19c53606abb99e8%5D/2/24/1%3A87%29)* -------------------- ## Labeling The anonymity of their avatars allows them to escape any sort of justice, but if another warlock acquires a real name, then they are at that warlock’s mercy. They must work for him or her, or risk being revealed to the authorities in real life and suffering the consequences. *[12/29/25 10:59 AM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/326/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/36/2/4%5B8IL20-04ed0e0eceb9449db19c53606abb99e8%5D/2/6/1%3A374%29)* The "names of power" -------------------- By giving a name to your experience, you can begin to get a handle on it, a new ability to understand and cope with it. *[12/29/25 11:00 AM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/326/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/36/2/4%5B8IL20-04ed0e0eceb9449db19c53606abb99e8%5D/2/8/1%3A355%29)* That's how I felt when I was told I might have dysthemia. Having a name for a vague feeling is a big relief. -------------------- ## The Three Elements Concentration means being able to train your attention on whatever object you choose, and sustain it there over time. Sensory clarity means having a lot of resolution of the details of whatever object you’re focusing on. Acceptance means having an attitude of openness, curiosity, and nonjudgment with whatever is happening in the moment. *[12/29/25 11:11 AM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/326/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/42/2/4%5BAFM60-04ed0e0eceb9449db19c53606abb99e8%5D/2/10/2/1%3A0%29)* -------------------- # The Jungle ## ONE She was so young—not quite sixteen—and small for her age, a mere child; and she had just been married *[12/22/25 7:50 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/322/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/22/2/4/12/1%3A681%29)* Ona was only 15 -------------------- # Christmas and Other Horrors: A Winter Solstice Anthology ## The Importance of a Tidy Home | Christopher Golden they are certainly not people. They are Schnabelperchten. *[11/26/25 8:34 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/630/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/20/2/4/50/2%5Bpage_13%5D%3A75%29)* -------------------- “It is the Epiphany,” he said. “Christmas ends tonight. January first begins the calendar year, but tonight is truly the beginning of the New Year. The Schnabelperchten bring happiness and blessings for the coming year, but only to those who are properly prepared for this new beginning, who have set their houses in order.” *[12/22/25 4:27 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/630/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/20/2/4/90/1%3A0%29)* -------------------- ## The Ones He Takes | Benjamin Percy THE ONES HE TAKES *[12/22/25 6:37 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/630/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/22/2/4/4/2/1%3A0%29)* Sometimes Santa doesn't leave gifts. Sometimes he recruits unwilling helpers -------------------- ## The Ghost of Christmases Past | Richard Kadrey THE GHOST OF CHRISTMASES PAST *[12/22/25 6:36 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/630/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/36/2/4/4/2/1%3A0%29)* After being given an ultimtum from Gryla, Laura joins the dark side of Christmas -------------------- ## The Lord of Misrule | M. Rickert When the door swung open it took me a moment to figure out that I needed to look down to find my greeter, a little boy sporting a gold paper crown atop his red curls, bathrobe cinched tight at his waist, a crest of some kind over his heart. *[12/22/25 6:42 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/630/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/50/2/4/112/1%3A357%29)* The Lord of Misrule -------------------- “I am the Lord of Misrule.” “Is that right?” “Sir.” “Excuse me?” “From now on, you must address me as Sir.” It was all I could do not to roll my eyes. Where was everybody? *[12/22/25 6:44 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/630/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/50/2/4/126/1%3A0%29)* -------------------- “I want you to come run and scream with me.” *[12/22/25 6:50 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/630/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/50/2/4/362/1%3A0%29)* -------------------- # Hark! The Herald Angels Scream ## Absinthe & Angels: Kelley Armstrong “Give us food. Give us wine. Then our song shall be thine,” *[11/23/25 8:21 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/629/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/14/2/4/4/110/1%3A0%29)* Mummers! -------------------- ## Christmas in Barcelona: Scott Smith CHRISTMAS IN BARCELONA *[12/22/25 4:21 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/629/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/16/2/4/4/4/2/2/1%3A0%29)* Toys that come to life on Christmas. Don't pick the wrong one... -------------------- ## Fresh as the New-Fallen Snow: Seanan McGuire FRESH AS THE NEW-FALLEN SNOW *[12/22/25 4:22 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/629/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/18/2/4/4/4/2/2/1%3A0%29)* Snegurochka - the Snow Maiden If you don't cherish your children, you'll lose them. -------------------- ## Love Me: Thomas E. Sniegoski LOVE ME *[12/22/25 4:22 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/629/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/20/2/4/4/4/2/2/1%3A0%29)* The worst Christmas Present is a needy monster. -------------------- ## Not Just for Christmas: Sarah Lotz NOT JUST FOR CHRISTMAS *[12/22/25 4:23 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/629/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/22/2/4/4/4/2/2/1%3A0%29)* GenPets -------------------- ## Good Deeds: Jeff Strand A little boy stood in front of me. Every time he fidgeted, a cloud of dirt came off his clothes. Poor little orphan. He held a pair of shoes. *[12/22/25 4:23 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/629/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/26/2/4/4/12/1%3A0%29)* Good old Jeff Strand - taking that glurgy Christmas Shoes song to a horrific extreme -------------------- ## It’s a Wonderful Knife: Christopher Golden IT’S A WONDERFUL KNIFE *[12/22/25 4:24 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/629/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/28/2/4/4/4/2/2/1%3A0%29)* A knife that appears for one minute on Christmas -------------------- # Hackers: Heroes of the Computer Revolution ## I. True Hackers: Cambridge: The Fifties and Sixties ### 1. The Tech Model Railroad Club When a piece of equipment wasn’t working, it was “losing”; when a piece of equipment was ruined, it was “munged” (mashed until no good); the two desks in the corner of the room were not called the office, but the “orifice”; one who insisted on studying for courses was a “tool”; garbage was called “cruft”; and a project undertaken or a product built not solely to fulfill some constructive goal, but with some wild pleasure taken in mere involvement, was called a “hack.” *[5/5/24 8:31 AM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/43/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/56/2/4/4/50/2%5Bpage_10%5D%3A634%29)* -------------------- While someone might call a clever connection between relays a “mere hack,” it would be understood that, to qualify as a hack, the feat must be imbued with innovation, style, and technical virtuosity. *[5/5/24 8:32 AM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/43/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/56/2/4/4/52/1%3A328%29)* -------------------- Marge Saunders would drive to the Safeway every Saturday morning in the Volkswagen and upon her return ask her husband, “Would you like to help me bring in the groceries?” Bob Saunders would reply, “No.” Stunned, Marge would drag in the groceries herself. After the same thing occurred a few times, she exploded, hurling curses at him and demanding to know why he said no to her question. “That’s a stupid question to ask,” he said. “Of course I won’t like to help you bring in the groceries. If you ask me if I’ll help you bring them in, that’s another matter.” *[5/5/24 8:34 AM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/43/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/56/2/4/4/156/1%3A295%29)* -------------------- ### 3. Spacewar To rub it in, the PDP-1 hackers developed a little demonstration based on the mnemonics of the instruction set of this bold new machine, which included such exotic instructions as DAC (Deposit Accumulator), LIO (Load Input-Output), DPY (Deplay), and JMP. The PDP-1 group would stand in a line and shout in unison: LAC, DAC, DIPPY DAP, LIO, DIO JUMP! When they chanted that last word—“Jump!”—they would all jump to the right. What was lacking in choreography was more than compensated for by enthusiasm: they were supercharged by the beauty of the machine, by the beauty of computers. *[5/5/24 8:33 AM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/43/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/60/2/4/4/42/1%3A273%29)* -------------------- ### 4. Greenblatt and Gosper someone like Marvin Minsky might happen along and say, “Here is a robot arm. I am leaving this robot arm by the machine.” Immediately, nothing in the world is as essential as making the proper interface between the machine and the robot arm, and putting the robot arm under your control, and figuring a way to create a system where the robot arm knows what the hell it is doing. *[5/5/24 8:32 AM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/43/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/62/2/4/4/26/1%3A1077%29)* -------------------- ## III. Game Hackers: The Sierras: The Eighties ### 17. Summer Camp “Breaking Out the Steel.” “Steel” was the clear but potent Steel’s peppermint schnapps which was On-Line Systems’ beverage of choice. In the company vernacular, a lot of steel would get you “sledged.” Once they broke out the steel on Fridays, it could be reasonably assumed that work on Time Zone would be halted while the staff, Ken leading the way, would explore the hazy, timeless zone of sledgedom. *[12/22/25 3:43 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/43/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/92/2/4/4/26/1%3A322%29)* -------------------- One day not long afterward, Ken walked into the office and said, “Who wants to come over my house and take pictures in the hot tub naked?” *[12/22/25 3:43 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/43/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/92/2/4/4/36/1%3A0%29)* -------------------- # Rebel Code: Linux and the Open Source Revolution ## PROLOGUE If good software can be written and given away like this, who needs Microsoft or companies like it? *[12/22/25 3:33 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/482/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/14/2/4/20/1%3A418%29)* -------------------- ## 1 - The Coolest Year Windows 3.1 shipped in June 1992 *[12/22/25 3:34 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/482/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/16/2/4/12/1%3A5%29)* -------------------- ## 2 - The New GNU Thing [Ken’s wife] Bonnie took their not quite one-year-old and flew to the West Coast for the month of August 1969.” During this time, Salus says, “Ken just sat down and wrote the Unix operating system in four weeks, in assembler” *[12/22/25 3:35 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/482/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/18/2/4/14/1%3A269%29)* -------------------- “The Unix philosophy is really very easy,” Salus says, “and consists of maybe two or three notions. The first one, which is perhaps the most innovative thing that Thompson ever thought of, is that everything is a file. Second is the notion that when you build something, no matter whether it’s an editor or whether it’s a way of attaching one file to another file, you write things that are for a single purpose but do that purpose well.” *[12/22/25 3:35 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/482/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/18/2/4/18/1%3A70%29)* -------------------- The person who had designed the Lisp Machine, Richard Greenblatt—described by Levy as “the hacker’s hacker”—wanted to found a new venture. *[12/22/25 3:36 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/482/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/18/2/4/60/1%3A0%29)* -------------------- Stallman wanted an operating system that could be easily transferred from one type of hardware to another. Because most operating systems had been conceived as the housekeeping software for one type of computer, portability was the exception rather than the rule. “Unix was, at least as far as I knew, the only portable system that really had users on different kinds of computers. So it was portable not just in theory but in actual practice,” *[12/22/25 3:36 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/482/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/18/2/4/90/1%3A0%29)* -------------------- His Unix work-alike would be called GNU, an acronym that stood for “GNU’s Not Unix,” *[12/22/25 3:37 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/482/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/18/2/4/94/1%3A139%29)* -------------------- This approach of releasing code and encouraging feedback and modifications from users, although not new–it had formed an implicit part of the entire Unix culture for years–became central to the rapid improvement of free software over the next fifteen years. *[12/22/25 3:37 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/482/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/18/2/4/122/1%3A233%29)* The Cathedral and the Bazaar -------------------- ## 3 - A Minor Rebellion “The license said fairly clearly [that] the source code shall not be made available to students,” Tanenbaum recalls. “Period. Nothing. None. Zero.” Version 7 represented the symbolic closing of Unix inside the black box of proprietary software—a sad end to what had long been the ultimate student hacker’s system. *[12/22/25 3:38 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/482/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/20/2/4/26/1%3A74%29)* -------------------- advTHANKSance *[12/22/25 3:38 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/482/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/20/2/4/74/2/14/1%3A0%29)* "Thanks" in "Advance"? *groan* -------------------- ## 5 - Patching Up “make it work first, then make it better,” as the Linux Networking-Howto puts it. *[12/22/25 3:39 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/482/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/24/2/4/104/1%3A467%29)* -------------------- ## 7 - Linus 2.0 Linux now has a logo thanks to the artistic talents of Larry Ewing *[12/22/25 3:40 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/482/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/28/2/4/78/2/2/1%3A0%29)* Tux became the official logo as of v2.0 -------------------- what might be called the Linux method is evident: Rather than trying to develop software on the best possible environment—a fast processor, lots of memory, no strange peripherals—you use an underpowered machine with lots of extras to winkle out unusual bugs *[12/22/25 3:41 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/482/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/28/2/4/98/1%3A12%29)* The weirder the hardware you develop on, the more potential "edge-case" bugs you may encounter. And fix. -------------------- Linus 2.0 was Patricia Miranda Torvalds, born at 6.22 AM, 5 December 1996, the time-stamp of the press release. One of her godfathers was Jon “maddog” Hall. *[12/22/25 3:42 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/482/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/28/2/4/120/1%3A0%29)* -------------------- # A Christmas Carol and Other Christmas Writings ## A Christmas Carol and Other Christmas Writings ### A Christmas Carol #### Stave One Marley’s Ghost There is no doubt that Marley was dead. This must be distinctly understood, or nothing wonderful can come of the story I am going to relate. *[12/9/25 8:42 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/408/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/16/2/4/10/1%3A76%29)* -------------------- “every idiot who goes about with ‘Merry Christmas,’ on his lips, should be boiled with his own pudding, and buried with a stake of holly through his heart. He should!” *[12/22/25 3:11 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/408/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/16/2/4/42/1%3A443%29)* -------------------- “If they would rather die,” said Scrooge, “they had better do it, and decrease the surplus population. *[12/21/25 8:23 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/408/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/16/2/4/126/1%3A0%29)* -------------------- If they would rather die,” said Scrooge, “they had better do it, and decrease the surplus population. *[12/22/25 3:11 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/408/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/16/2/4/126/1%3A1%29)* -------------------- “A poor excuse for picking a man’s pocket every twenty-fifth of December!” said Scrooge, buttoning his great-coat to the chin. “But I suppose you must have the whole day. Be here all the earlier next morning!” *[12/21/25 8:25 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/408/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/16/2/4/156/1%3A0%29)* -------------------- And then let any man explain to me, if he can, how it happened that Scrooge, having his key in the lock of the door, saw in the knocker, without its undergoing any intermediate process of change: not a knocker, but Marley’s face. *[12/21/25 8:29 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/408/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/16/2/4/162/1%3A555%29)* -------------------- You may be an undigested bit of beef, a blot of mustard, a crumb of cheese, a fragment of an underdone potato. There’s more of gravy than of grave about you, whatever you are!” *[12/7/25 9:12 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/408/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/16/2/4/232/1%3A107%29)* -------------------- #### Stave Two The First of the Three Spirits May you be happy in the life you have chosen! *[12/22/25 3:12 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/408/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/18/2/4/260/1%3A231%29)* -------------------- That they are what they are, do not blame me! *[12/22/25 3:13 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/408/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/18/2/4/290/1%3A79%29)* -------------------- #### Stave Three The Second of the Three Spirits “Come in!” exclaimed the Ghost. “Come in! and know me better, man!” *[12/22/25 3:13 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/408/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/20/2/4/14/1%3A0%29)* -------------------- He told me, coming home, that he hoped the people saw him in the church, because he was a cripple, and it might be pleasant to them to remember upon Christmas Day, who made lame beggars walk and blind men see. *[12/22/25 3:15 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/408/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/20/2/4/116/1%3A145%29)* -------------------- “I see a vacant seat,” replied the Ghost, “in the poor chimney corner, and a crutch without an owner, carefully preserved. If these shadows remain unaltered by the Future, the child will die. *[12/22/25 3:16 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/408/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/20/2/4/146/1%3A0%29)* -------------------- What then? If he be like to die, he had better do it, and decrease the surplus population. *[12/22/25 3:16 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/408/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/20/2/4/150/1%3A115%29)* -------------------- I’ll drink his health for your sake and the Day’s,” said Mrs. Cratchit, “not for his. Long life to him! A merry Christmas and a happy new year!—he’ll be very merry and very happy, I have no doubt! *[12/22/25 3:16 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/408/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/20/2/4/168/1%3A1%29)* -------------------- Scrooge was the Ogre of the family. The mention of his name cast a dark shadow on the party, which was not dispelled for full five minutes. *[12/22/25 3:17 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/408/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/20/2/4/170/1%3A176%29)* -------------------- “I have found it out! I know what it is, Fred! I know what it is!” “What is it?” cried Fred. “It’s your Uncle Scro-o-o-o-oge!” *[12/22/25 3:17 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/408/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/20/2/4/248/1%3A0%29)* -------------------- This boy is Ignorance. This girl is Want. Beware them both, and all of their degree, but most of all beware this boy, for on his brow I see that written which is Doom, unless the writing be erased. *[12/22/25 3:18 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/408/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/20/2/4/294/1%3A111%29)* -------------------- #### Stave Five The End of it “What’s to-day, my fine fellow?” said Scrooge. “To-day!” replied the boy. “Why, CHRISTMAS DAY.” *[12/22/25 3:18 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/408/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/24/2/4/32/1%3A0%29)* -------------------- “Lord bless me!” cried the gentleman, as if his breath were gone. “My dear Mr. Scrooge, are you serious?” “If you please,” said Scrooge. “Not a farthing less. A great many back-payments are included in it, I assure you. Will you do me that favour?” *[12/22/25 3:20 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/408/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/24/2/4/84/1%3A0%29)* No version of this story ever suggests how much Scrooge offers in "back-payments" -------------------- Scrooge was better than his word. He did it all, and infinitely more; and to Tiny Tim, who did NOT die, he was a second father. He became as good a friend, as good a master, and as good a man, as the good old city knew, or any other good old city, town, or borough, in the good old world *[12/22/25 3:21 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/408/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/24/2/4/142/1%3A0%29)* "Aw! Ain't that swell!" -------------------- it was always said of him, that he knew how to keep Christmas well, if any man alive possessed the knowledge. May that be truly said of us, and all of us! And so, as Tiny Tim observed, God bless Us, Every One! *[12/22/25 3:21 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/408/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/24/2/4/146/1%3A112%29)* -------------------- # Calm the F*ck Down: How to Control What You Can and Accept What You Can't So You Can Stop Freaking Out and Get on With Your Life ## I SO YOU’RE FREAKING OUT: Acknowledge the real problem and rein in your reaction ### The Four Faces of Freaking Out #### Anxiety, Sadness, Anger, and Avoidance Anxiety Sadness Anger Avoidance (aka “Ostrich Mode”) These are the Four Faces of Freaking Out—the masks we wear when we worry obsessively—and ooh, mama it’s getting hard to breathe up in this piece. *[10/19/23 11:30 AM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/392/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/18/2/4/2/2%5Bchapter001%5D/94/2%5Ba002a%5D/2/1%3A0%29)* -------------------- ### Freakout funds In The Life-Changing Magic of Not Giving a Fuck I introduced the concept of “fuck bucks,” which are the resources—time, energy, and money—that you spend on everything you care about, from activities and appointments to friends, family, and more. *[10/19/23 11:51 AM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/392/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/18/2/4/2/2%5Bchapter001%5D/196/1%3A0%29)* -------------------- freakout funds (FFs). These are the fuck bucks you access when shit happens. *[10/19/23 11:53 AM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/392/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/18/2/4/2/2%5Bchapter001%5D/200/6/1%3A0%29)* -------------------- ### The Fourth Fund #### Goodwill Unlike time, energy, and money, the goodwill account is not held by you. It is funded by the sympathy and/or assistance of others, and is theirs to dole out or withhold as they see fit. Your job is to keep your account in good standing by not being a fucking freakshow all the time *[10/19/23 11:58 AM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/392/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/18/2/4/2/2%5Bchapter001%5D/242/4/1%3A0%29)* AKA: psychic vampire -------------------- if you freak out all the time, about everything, you’re spending heavily against your account of goodwill. *[10/19/23 12:00 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/392/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/18/2/4/2/2%5Bchapter001%5D/256/2/1%3A0%29)* -------------------- #### Hot take, coming right up! If not a day goes by when you don’t don your Anxious Freakout Face—and consequently get all up in other people’s faces with your problems—then it may be time to consider that You. Are. Part. Of. Your. Problem. *[10/19/23 12:58 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/392/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/18/2/4/2/2%5Bchapter001%5D/288/1%3A0%29)* -------------------- ### Mental decluttering and the One Question to Rule Them All When what-ifs become worries and worries become freakouts and freakouts make everything harder and more miserable than it ever had to be, one of the things you can control right away is your emotional response. *[10/19/23 1:01 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/392/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/18/2/4/2/2%5Bchapter001%5D/326/1%3A0%29)* If you can't change the situation, change your mind. -------------------- ## II CALM THE FUCK DOWN: Identify what you can control, accept what you can’t, and let that shit go ### Pick a category, any category #### Feat. The Sarah Knight Shitstorm Scale you cannot compare your experience of any given shitstorm to anyone else’s experience of a different shitstorm. Is your broken heart more or less “major” than my broken tooth? WHO CAN SAY. *[10/20/23 1:56 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/392/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/22/2/4/2/2%5Bchapter002%5D/16/1%3A9%29)* -------------------- The five categories on the Sarah Knight Shitstorm Scale are as follows: Category 1: HIGHLY UNLIKELY Category 2: POSSIBLE BUT NOT LIKELY Category 3: LIKELY Category 4: HIGHLY LIKELY Category 5: INEVITABLE *[10/20/23 1:57 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/392/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/22/2/4/2/2%5Bchapter002%5D/30/2%5Bpage-72%5D%3A0%29)* -------------------- ### Option 2: Houdini that shit #### How to stop being anxious about something ##### Give anxiety the finger(s) When I’m anxious, I walk around the house wiggling my digits like I’m playing air piano or doing low-key jazz hands. My husband calls them my “decluttering fingers” since they always signal a prelude to some semimanic tidying. But in addition to clearing out the kitchen cabinets or denuding the coffee table of old magazines, what I’m doing is temporarily channeling my anxiety into something productive and, to me, comforting. *[11/3/23 11:44 AM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/392/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/22/2/4/2/2%5Bchapter002%5D/466/1%3A0%29)* I worry ("worry?") that this can also go too far and become avoidance. -------------------- #### Tonight You, meet Tomorrow You And you know, I’ve always trusted Tomorrow Me to handle tomorrow’s tasks, assuming she gets enough shut-eye. Now I recognize that it’s Tonight Me’s job to get her to the starting line in fine fettle. *[11/3/23 11:50 AM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/392/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/22/2/4/2/2%5Bchapter002%5D/524/2%5Bpage-112%5D%3A0%29)* Fine advice. If I can manage it. But it's good to keep the perspective that I should focus on what I can do now - and that to provide "tomorrow me" with the best tools to deal with it. Or at the very least, not handicap "tomorrow me" with a lack of sleep on top of the thing I'm worried about. -------------------- ### Secret Option C #### Productive Helpful Effective Worrying (PHEW) You can’t stop worrying? Fine. Worry away! But make it count for something. *[11/24/25 6:33 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/392/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/22/2/4/2/2%5Bchapter002%5D/642/1%3A0%29)* -------------------- # 101 Horror Books to Read Before You're Murdered ## I. Paranormal ### Ghosts Get in the Holiday “Spirit”! *[11/24/25 3:18 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/567/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/50/2/4/4/2%5BPage_27%5D%3A0%29)* Book recs for the winter holidays -------------------- ## II. Supernatural if paranormal horror carries with it that human inclination to have an explanation for strange phenomena, supernatural is the kind of horror that doesn’t care about your feelings. This is happening, and there is no reasonable explanation for any of it, so just get on board or you’ll lose your mind trying to understand it. *[10/18/23 3:45 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/567/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/74/2/4/10/1%3A5%29)* Supernatural is the kind of horror that doesn't care about your feelings. -------------------- ## IV. Natural Order Horror WE LIVE IN A WORLD THAT is trying to kill us. We are the weakest link. Take away our technology and our weapons and what do we have? Nothing. Our teeth aren’t sharp, we don’t have claws, and most of us can’t outrun anything that has four legs. We can’t even hide. Nobody is naturally camouflaged, and we’re very noisy. *[10/18/23 3:42 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/567/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/232/2/4/6/2/1%3A0%29)* -------------------- # Lila: An Inquiry Into Morals ## Part One ### Chapter 2 This “slip-world” was quite a world and he’d almost lost it once because he hadn’t written any of it down and incidents came along that had destroyed his memory of it. Now he had reconstructed what seemed like most of it on these slips and he didn’t want to lose it again. *[3/3/25 6:06 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/32/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/22/2/4%5B8IL20-6cc476539d404d95ab2e09892ceb1d44%5D/68/1%3A84%29)* This has to be a reference to ZATHOMM -------------------- Now the main purpose of the slips was not to help him remember anything. It was to help him to forget it. That sounded contradictory but the purpose was to keep his head empty, to put all his ideas of the past four years on that pilot berth where he didn’t have to think of them. *[3/3/25 6:09 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/32/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/22/2/4%5B8IL20-6cc476539d404d95ab2e09892ceb1d44%5D/70/1%3A269%29)* This sounds like a Zettelkasten -------------------- There’s an old analogy to a cup of tea. If you want to drink new tea you have to get rid of the old tea that’s in your cup, otherwise your cup just overflows and you get a wet mess. Your head is like that cup. It has a limited capacity and if you want to learn something about the world you should keep your head empty in order to learn it. *[3/3/25 6:09 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/32/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/22/2/4%5B8IL20-6cc476539d404d95ab2e09892ceb1d44%5D/72/1%3A0%29)* -------------------- When any distribution is locked into a rigid sequential format it develops Joes that dictate what new changes will be allowed and what will not, and that rigidity is deadly. *[3/3/25 6:10 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/32/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/22/2/4%5B8IL20-6cc476539d404d95ab2e09892ceb1d44%5D/74/1%3A729%29)* -------------------- It was fascinating to watch this thing grow. No one that he knew had ever written a whole metaphysics before and there were no rules for doing it and no way of predicting how it would progress. *[9/24/22 3:47 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/32/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/22/2/4%5B8IL20-6cc476539d404d95ab2e09892ceb1d44%5D/94/1%3A0%29)* Pirsig's unintentional zettlekasten? https://zettelkasten.de/posts/pirsig-lila/ -------------------- In addition to the topic categories, five other categories had emerged. Phædrus felt these were of great importance: *[2/20/23 4:16 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/32/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/22/2/4%5B8IL20-6cc476539d404d95ab2e09892ceb1d44%5D/96/1%3A0%29)* Pirsig's slip organization system topics -------------------- # Pet Sematary ## Part One: The Pet Sematary ### Chapter 21 The next day Louis called the intensive care unit at the EMMC. Norma’s condition was still listed as critical; that was standard operating procedure for the first twenty-four hours following a heart attack. Louis got a cheerier assessment from Weybridge, her doctor, however. “I wouldn’t even call it a minor myocardial infarction,” he said. “No scarring. She owes you a hell of a lot, Dr. Creed.” *[10/23/23 2:36 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/432/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/64/2/4%5BSJGS0-3b244941b5f34a97a96a55e38fe522ac%5D/4/1%3A0%29)* This is my hot-take on why Jud takes Louis to the Micmac buying ground. Louis saved Norma's life. Jud needed something big to re-pay Louis for what Jud considered a monumental deed. -------------------- ### Chapter 22 “Go on and bury your animal,” he said. “I’m gonna have a smoke. I’d help you, but you got to do it yourself. Each buries his own. That’s the way it was done then.” “Jud, what’s this all about? Why did you bring me here?” “Because you saved Norma’s life,” Jud said, and although he sounded sincere—and Louis was positive he believed himself sincere—he had a sudden, overpowering sense that the man was lying . . . or that he was being lied to and then passing the lie on to Louis. He remembered that look he had seen, or thought he had seen, in Jud’s eye. *[10/24/23 8:51 AM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/432/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/66/2/4%5BTI1E0-3b244941b5f34a97a96a55e38fe522ac%5D/356/1%3A0%29)* See?? Maybe Jud felt the compulsion to perpetuate the Micmac burying ground, but he did it out of a sense of duty to repay a debt he felt he owed to Louis. -------------------- “Do you think the ground’s gone sour?” Jud smiled—or at least his lips slanted. “I think it’s a dangerous place,” he said softly, “but not for cats or dogs or pet hamsters. Go on and bury your animal, Louis.” *[10/24/23 8:55 AM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/432/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/66/2/4%5BTI1E0-3b244941b5f34a97a96a55e38fe522ac%5D/390/2%5Bpage_176%5D%3A94%29)* Foreshadowing -------------------- “And the things that are in a man’s heart—it don’t do him much good to talk about those things, does it?” “Well—” “No,” Jud said, as if Louis had simply agreed. “It don’t.” And in his calm voice that was so sure and so implacable, in that voice which somehow put the chill through Louis, he said: “They are secret things. Women are supposed to be the ones good at keeping secrets, and I guess they do keep a few, but any woman who knows anything at all would tell you she’s never really seen into any man’s heart. The soil of a man’s heart is stonier, Louis—like the soil up there in the old Micmac burying ground. Bedrock’s close. A man grows what he can . . . and he tends it.” *[10/24/23 9:00 AM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/432/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/66/2/4%5BTI1E0-3b244941b5f34a97a96a55e38fe522ac%5D/464/1%3A0%29)* -------------------- ### Chapter 26 “Lester did it and Stanny did it for the same reason I did it. You do it because it gets hold of you. You do it because that burial place is a secret place, and you want to share the secret, and when you find a reason that seems good enough, why . . .” *[10/24/23 1:16 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/432/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/74/2/4%5B11C3M0-3b244941b5f34a97a96a55e38fe522ac%5D/222/1%3A0%29)* -------------------- “That place . . . all at once it gets hold of you . . . and you make up the sweetest-smelling reasons in the world . . . but I could have been wrong, Louis. That’s all I’m saying. *[10/24/23 1:17 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/432/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/74/2/4%5B11C3M0-3b244941b5f34a97a96a55e38fe522ac%5D/228/1%3A0%29)* -------------------- ### Chapter 35 Louis and his son laughed together. Gage reached out his free hand, groping, and Louis took it in his own. They stood together that way in the middle of Mrs. Vinton’s field, looking up at the Vulture. It was a moment with his son that Louis never forgot. As he had gone up and into the kite as a child himself, he now found himself going into Gage, his son. He felt himself shrink until he was within Gage’s tiny house, looking out of the windows that were his eyes—looking out at a world that was so huge and bright, a world where Mrs. Vinton’s field was nearly as big as the Bonneville Salt Flats, where the kite soared miles above him, the string drumming in his fist like a live thing as the wind blew around him, tumbling his hair. “Kite flyne!” Gage cried out to his father, and Louis put his arm around Gage’s shoulders and kissed the boy’s cheek, in which the wind had bloomed a wild rose. “I love you, Gage,” he said—it was between the two of them, and that was all right. And Gage, who now had less than two months to live, laughed shrilly and joyously. “Kite flyne! Kite flyne, Daddy!” *[10/20/23 3:51 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/432/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/92/2/4%5B19UOO0-3b244941b5f34a97a96a55e38fe522ac%5D/70/1%3A206%29)* -------------------- ## Part Two: The Micmac Burying Ground ### Chapter 37 Keep him alive, Ellie, if that’s what you want, he thought and kissed her. The shrinks would probably say it’s as unhealthy as hell, but I’m for it. Because I know the day will come—maybe as soon as this Friday—when you forget to carry the picture and I’ll see it lying on your bed in this empty room while you ride your bike around the driveway or walk in the field behind the house or go over to Kathy McGown’s house to make clothes with her Sew Perfect. Gage won’t be with you, and that’s when Gage drops off whatever Hot One Hundred there is that exists in little girls’ hearts and starts to become Something That happened in 1984. A blast from the past. *[10/20/24 3:27 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/432/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/98/2/4%5B1CQAE0-3b244941b5f34a97a96a55e38fe522ac%5D/150/2/1%3A0%29)* -------------------- # Critical Failures II - Fail Harder ## Chapter 1 Chapter 1 *[5/8/24 1:57 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/414/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/6/2/4/2/4/2%5B17-290521e24eaf48e081121b4b1b4f3cf7%5D/1%3A0%29)* Started 2024-05-08 * Dave - Dwarf Cleric * Tim - Halfling * Cooper - Half-Orc Barbarian * Julian - Elf Wizard/Sorcerer * Chaz - Human Bard * Katherine - Druid Ranger -------------------- # Your Head is a Houseboat ## CHAPTER FOUR: THE FREELOADER PARTY JOURNALLING TO HEAR YOUR OWN VOICE *[4/23/24 10:06 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/592/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/20/2/4/2/156%5BpAxO%5D/2%5Bpage_65%5D%3A1%29)* -------------------- ## CHAPTER FIVE: THE RIVER TO THE OCEAN JOURNALLING FOR DIRECTION *[4/23/24 10:07 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/592/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/22/2/4/2/90%5BpA20d%5D/2%5Bpage_79%5D%3A1%29)* -------------------- ## CHAPTER SIX: THE FIVE BOSSES JOURNALLING FOR WANTS AND NEEDS *[4/24/24 8:52 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/592/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/24/2/4/2/114%5BpA8-u%5D/2%5Bpage_90%5D%3A1%29)* -------------------- ## CHAPTER SEVEN: THE GRUMPY SOCK PUPPETS JOURNALLING TO REFRAME YOUR INSECURITIES *[4/25/24 12:47 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/592/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/26/2/4/2/140/2%5Bpage_106%5D%3A1%29)* -------------------- ## CHAPTER EIGHT: THE WACKY WINDSHIELD JOURNALLING FOR BIASES *[4/29/24 10:45 AM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/592/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/28/2/4/2/110%5BpALkL%5D/2%5Bpage_116%5D%3A1%29)* -------------------- # I Lost Everything in the Post-Natal Depression ## 3. Talk to Me—I’m Your Mother “Your son can’t seem to keep his mouth shut,” she said. “He talks incessantly during class, shouts out the answers before there are questions, and is known to his classmates as ‘Elastic Mouth.’ ” *[4/17/24 10:10 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/14/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/20/2/4/144/1%3A0%29)* -------------------- I looked at the polluted bowl of water with the pump that gasped and gurgled. Other than the Cuyahoga River in Cleveland, it was possibly the only body of water to catch fire. *[4/17/24 10:12 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/14/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/20/2/4/202/1%3A0%29)* -------------------- # Furiously Happy ## I’m Not Psychotic. I Just Need to Get in Front of You in Line. coupled with some asshole telling you that “your medication not working is just proof that you don’t really need medication at all.” I can’t think of another type of illness where the sufferer is made to feel guilty and question their self-care when their medications need to be changed. *[3/10/24 6:18 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/541/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/36/2/4/30/1%3A691%29)* -------------------- Brains are like toddlers. They are wonderful and should be treasured, but that doesn’t mean you should trust them to take care of you in an avalanche or process serotonin effectively. *[3/10/24 6:18 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/541/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/36/2/4/40/1%3A668%29)* -------------------- ## Skinterventions and Bangtox like when I heard about “microdermabrasion,” which I suspect is Latin for “I want to pull off your skin and turn it into a jacket.” My dermatologist sent me an e-mail about it, saying something about how my new skin was suffocating underneath layers of my old, dead skin, and I suddenly felt like I was wearing a mask of dust mites and dirt. I needed to have this done immediately and I couldn’t go alone. *[3/10/24 6:19 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/541/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/46/2/4/16/1%3A229%29)* -------------------- ## I Left My Heart in San Francisco. (But Replace “San Francisco” with “Near the Lemur House” and Replace “Heart” with a Sad Question Mark.) You know when you’re walking to the trash can at the zoo and you’re holding something important in one hand, and you have something you have to throw away in the other hand, and you’re sort of distracted *[6/26/23 11:50 AM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/541/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/54/2/4/6/1%3A0%29)* This entire chapter is gold. -------------------- ## Appendix: An Interview with the Author And God shook his head and muttered, “Jesus, that fucking snake is like TMZ.” And then Adam was like, “Who’s Jesus?” and God said, “No one yet. It’s just an idea I’m throwing around.” *[2/21/23 7:00 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/541/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/58/2/4/10/1%3A669%29)* -------------------- Sometimes being crazy is a demon. And sometimes the demon is me. And I visit quiet sidewalks and loud parties and dark movies, and a small demon looks out at the world with me. Sometimes it sleeps. Sometimes it plays. Sometimes it laughs with me. Sometimes it tries to kill me. But it’s always with me. *[2/21/23 7:06 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/541/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/58/2/4/56/1%3A23%29)* -------------------- ## An Essay on Parsley, Wasabi, Cream Cheese, and Soup at this point drunk me writes much better than sober me. She is such an asshole. *[6/9/23 7:48 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/541/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/72/2/4/6/2/1%3A237%29)* -------------------- ## We’re Better Than Galileo. Because He’s Dead. Even when everything’s going your way you can still be sad. Or anxious. Or uncomfortably numb. Because you can’t always control your brain or your emotions even when things are perfect. *[6/13/23 5:42 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/541/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/82/2/4/48/1%3A60%29)* -------------------- You learn to appreciate the fact that what drives you is very different from what you’re told should make you happy. You learn that it’s okay to prefer your personal idea of heaven (live-tweeting zombie movies from under a blanket of kittens) rather than someone else’s idea that fame/fortune/parties are the pinnacle we should all reach for. And there’s something surprisingly freeing about that. *[6/13/23 5:44 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/541/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/82/2/4/60/1%3A0%29)* -------------------- The Spoon Theory was created by a friend of mine, Christine Miserandino, to explain the limits you have when you live with chronic illness. *[6/13/23 5:45 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/541/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/82/2/4/70/1%3A0%29)* -------------------- ## I’m Going to Die. Eventually. Whenever I go to wash my hands, if the automatic sink doesn’t work I immediately assume that I’ve died in the bathroom stall and that it’s my ghost trying to wash my hands.” *[6/21/23 1:17 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/541/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/86/2/4/82/1%3A1%29)* -------------------- “But seriously, it should be spelled ‘hampster.’ We’re all saying it that way anyway.” *[6/21/23 1:19 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/541/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/86/2/4/102/1%3A67%29)* -------------------- # Ready Player One ## Level One ### Chapter 14 Wade Owen Watts. Born August twelfth, 2024 *[2/18/24 8:18 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/450/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/44/2/4%5BJ2B80-de954461a31249f29a14d8a0560298d2%5D/174/1%3A55%29)* Parzival's Birthday! -------------------- ## Level Two ### Chapter 20 It was also time to elect the president and VP of the OASIS User Council, but that was a no-brainer. Like most gunters, I voted to reelect Cory Doctorow and Wil Wheaton (again). There were no term limits, and those two geezers had been doing a kick-ass job of protecting user rights for over a decade. *[2/22/24 8:48 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/450/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/58/2/4%5BPNV60-de954461a31249f29a14d8a0560298d2%5D/12/1%3A240%29)* -------------------- # Broken (in the best possible way) ## Awkwarding Brings Us Together Airport cashier: “Have a safe flight.” Me: “You too!” I CAN NEVER COME HERE AGAIN. *[1/16/24 9:39 AM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/544/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/40/2/4/2/6/1%3A0%29)* An entire chapter of contributions of embarrassing interactions in public -------------------- # Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance: An Inquiry Into Values ## Part I ### 2 The shop was a different scene from the ones I remembered. The mechanics, who had once all seemed like ancient veterans, now looked like children. A radio was going full blast and they were clowning around and talking and seemed not to notice me. When one of them finally came over he barely listened to the piston slap before saying, "Oh yeah. Tappets.'' Tappets? I should have known then what was coming. Two weeks later I paid their bill for 140 dollars, rode the cycle carefully at varying low speeds to wear it in and then after one thousand miles opened it up. At about seventy-five it seized again and freed at thirty, the same as before. When I brought it back they accused me of not breaking it in properly, but after much argument agreed to look into it. They overhauled it again and this time took it out themselves for a high-speed road test. It seized on them this time. *[9/21/22 9:16 AM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/377/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/12/2/4/78/1%3A0%29)* -------------------- ### 4 you pick up certain feelings about an individual machine that are unique for that one individual machine and no other. *[12/27/23 1:21 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/377/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/16/2/4/86/1%3A255%29)* The same goes for many different machines. -------------------- ### 5 "What's shim?'' "It's a thin, flat strip of metal. You just slip it around the handlebar under the collar there and it will open up the collar to where you can tighten it again. You use shims like that to make adjustments in all kinds of machines.'' "Oh,'' he said. He was getting interested. "Good. Where do you buy them?'' "I've got some right here,'' I said gleefully, holding up a can of beer in my hand. He didn't understand for a moment. Then he said, "What, the can?'' "Sure,'' I said, "best shim stock in the world.'' I thought this was pretty clever myself. Save him a trip to God knows where to get shim stock. Save him time. Save him money. But to my surprise he didn't see the cleverness of this at all. In fact he got noticeably haughty about the whole thing. Pretty soon he was dodging and filling with all kinds of excuses and, before I realized what his real attitude was, we had decided not to fix the handlebars after all. As far as I know those handlebars are still loose. And I believe now that he was actually offended at the time. I had had the nerve to propose repair of his new eighteen-hundred dollar BMW, the pride of a half-century of German mechanical finesse, with a piece of old beer can! *[9/21/22 9:20 AM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/377/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/18/2/4/54/1%3A0%29)* A hack isn't hacky if it works. -------------------- This comes up all the time in mechanical work. A hang-up. You just sit and stare and think, and search randomly for new information, and go away and come back again, and after a while the unseen factors start to emerge. *[1/13/24 9:47 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/377/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/18/2/4/84/1%3A692%29)* It comes up in information work, too. I spend days hating myself for not getting things done, and then I realize I've been just meditating on the problem. Waiting for ideas to surface. -------------------- ## Part II ### 12 A light switch in DeWeese's studio didn't work and he asked Phaedrus if he knew what was wrong with it. He had a slightly embarrassed, slightly puzzled smile on his face, like the smile of an art patron talking to a painter. The patron is embarrassed to reveal how little he knows but is smiling with the expectation of learning more. Unlike the Sutherlands, who hate technology, DeWeese was so far removed from it he didn't feel it any particular menace. DeWeese was actually a technology buff, a patron of the technologies. He didn't understand them, but he knew what he liked, and he always enjoyed learning more. He had the illusion the trouble was in the wire near the bulb because immediately upon toggling the switch the light went out. If the trouble had been in the switch, he felt, there would have been a lapse of time before the trouble showed up in the bulb. Phaedrus did not argue with this, but went across the street to the hardware store, bought a switch and in a few minutes had it installed. It worked immediately, of course, leaving DeWeese puzzled and frustrated. "How did you know the trouble was in the switch?'' he asked. "Because it worked intermittently when I jiggled the switch.'' "Well…couldn't it jiggle the wire?'' "No.'' Phaedrus' cocksure attitude angered DeWeese and he started to argue. "How do you know all that?'' he said. "It's obvious.'' "Well then, why didn't I see it?'' "You have to have some familiarity.'' "Then it's not obvious, is it?'' *[9/21/22 9:17 AM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/377/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/34/2/4/64/1%3A0%29)* Some people just have a "knack"? -------------------- ## Part III ### 16 The idea that the majority of students attend a university for an education independent of the degree and grades is a little hypocrisy everyone is happier not to expose. Occasionally some students do arrive for an education but rote and the mechanical nature of the institution soon converts them to a less idealistic attitude. *[11/10/23 2:34 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/377/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/44/2/4/108/1%3A30%29)* The idea of a grade-less university -------------------- # How to ADHD: An Insider's Guide to Working with Your Brain (Not Against It) ## Chapter 2: How to ADHD research shows that—compared to neurotypical children—punishment is less effective for ADHD kids, while immediate positive feedback and salient rewards are more effective. *[1/9/24 6:54 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/581/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/16/2/4/4/20%5Bd1-d2s6d3s9%5D/10/1%3A9%29)* -------------------- # Let's Pretend This Never Happened ## And Then I Got Stabbed in the Face by a Serial Killer I know other people who are like me. They take the same drugs as me. They try all the therapies. They are brilliant and amazing and forever broken. I’m lucky that although Victor doesn’t understand it, he tries to understand, telling me, “Relax. There’s absolutely nothing to panic about.” I smile gratefully at him and pretend that’s all I needed to hear and that this is just a silly phase that will pass one day. I know there’s nothing to panic about. And that’s exactly what makes it so much worse. *[11/22/23 10:49 AM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/545/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/54/2/4/56%5Bp723%5D/1%3A0%29)* -------------------- ## The Psychopath on the Other Side of the Bathroom Door It was about this time that I decided I needed to take action, so I found some Pepto-Bismol and took a full dose. I considered taking more, but at this point I was concerned that I might have to call 911 for help and I didn’t want to have to explain why I’d taken three times the recommended amount of laxatives and three times the recommended amount of antidiarrhea medicine, because even to me that sounded like some sort of poorly planned suicide attempt. *[11/22/23 10:50 AM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/545/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/62/2/4/64%5Bp1052%5D/1%3A0%29)* -------------------- # The Shining ## Part Two: Closing Day ### Chapter Twelve: The Grand Tour By the time he was two and a half he had been unlocking the protective gate his father had installed at the top of the stairs in the Stovington house. He had seen how the lock worked. His daddy said it was a NACK. Some people had the NACK and some people didn’t. *[11/20/23 12:45 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/577/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/44/2/4/126/1%3A415%29)* -------------------- ## Part Three: The Wasps’ Nest ### Chapter Nineteen: Outside 217 but Mr. Ullman would probably do neither because he was a CHEAP PRICK. Danny knew that this was one of the worst epithets his father could summon. *[11/20/23 4:43 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/577/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/60/2/4/86/1%3A657%29)* -------------------- ### Chapter Twenty: Talking to Mr. Ullman It had been a bitter sort of joke between them at first, before the drinking had gotten too bad for jokes. He had claimed that Excedrin was the only nonprescription drug ever invented that could stop a hangover dead in its tracks. Absolutely the only one. He had begun to think of his morning-after thumpers as Excedrin Headache Number Vat 69. *[11/20/23 4:51 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/577/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/62/2/4/56/1%3A84%29)* -------------------- ### Chapter Twenty-One: Night Thoughts It wasn’t LOSING YOUR MARBLES, Daddy said, it was HAVING A BREAKDOWN, and Mr. Stenger wasn’t in a BUGHOUSE but in a SANNY-TARIUM. *[11/20/23 6:23 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/577/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/64/2/4/234/1%3A460%29)* -------------------- Sometimes when he fell down or bumped his head or had a bellyache, he would begin to cry and the memory would flash over him, accompanied by the fear that he would not be able to stop crying, that he would just go on and on, weeping and wailing, until his daddy went to the phone, dialed it, and said: “Hello? This is Jack Torrance at 149 Mapleline Way. My son here can’t stop crying. Please send THE MEN IN THE WHITE COATS to take him to the SANNY-TARIUM. That’s right, he’s LOST HIS MARBLES. Thank you.” And the gray truck with no windows would come rolling up to his door, they would load him in, still weeping hysterically, and take him away. When would he see his mommy and daddy again? NO ONE KNOWS. *[11/20/23 6:24 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/577/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/64/2/4/246/1%3A140%29)* -------------------- ## Part Four: Snowbound ### Chapter Twenty-Nine: Kitchen Talk “I’m sorry,” Jack said. “But I have to, you know. I’m the goddam caretaker. It’s what I’m paid for.” *[11/21/23 12:28 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/577/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/82/2/4/206/1%3A0%29)* I think this is the first time Jack admits that the Hotel takes precedence over his family. At least admits it out loud. -------------------- # Everything's Eventual: 14 Dark Tales ## All That You Love Will Be Carried Away Would he begin by saying, “Ma’am, according to at least one source I’ve read recently, all that you love will be carried away”? *[11/18/23 11:55 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/55/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/22/2/4/24/1%3A150%29)* -------------------- From the room to the left of the one where he intended to kill himself, Alfie could hear the early news, but it would sound better in that farmhouse over yonder, he was sure of that. *[11/18/23 11:57 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/55/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/22/2/4/30/1%3A282%29)* -------------------- ## Everything’s Eventual DINKY’S DAYBOARD. That’s another fringe benefit. I write down whatever I want during the week, and I get everything I ask for *[11/19/23 12:09 AM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/55/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/42/2/4/52/2/1%3A0%29)* -------------------- # Holidays on Ice ## SantaLand Diaries Tonight I saw a woman slap and shake her sobbing daughter, yelling, “Goddamn it, Rachel, get on that man’s lap and smile or I’ll give you something to cry about.” *[11/11/23 11:36 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/394/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/12/2/4/150/1%3A172%29)* -------------------- # Paperbacks From Hell: The Twisted History of '70s and '80s Horror Fiction ## Introduction The Gestapochauns live in the dark, battling their ancient rat enemies with teeny bullwhips. Shortly after we meet them, the author lets us know that these are not just any Nazi leprechauns. These are psychic Nazi leprechauns who enjoy S&M, are covered with scars from pleasure/pain sessions with their creator, were trained as sex slaves for full-sized human men, and are actually stunted fetuses taken from Jewish concentration camp victims. And one of them is named Adolph. *[11/10/23 2:40 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/436/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/18/2/4/2%5Bitr%5D/10%5Bp4%5D/1%3A0%29)* -------------------- ## Chapter 2: Creepy Kids That seems to be curtains for Damien, and it certainly was for the film franchise. Not so for McGill, who returned in 1982 to write an Omen novel not based on a film, Omen IV: Armageddon 2000, which opens with a scene of rectal childbirth. *[11/10/23 2:41 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/436/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/24/2/4/2%5Bc02%5D/24%5Bp7%5D/1%3A813%29)* -------------------- The only book written by Mendal W. Johnson, who died two years after it was published, 1974’s Let’s Go Play at the Adams’ still elicits passionate loathing. Search online and you’ll find readers who describe destroying the book after finishing it, who write about being left ill, about how sick the author must have been. *[11/10/23 2:42 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/436/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/24/2/4/2%5Bc02%5D/108%5Bp47%5D/1%3A0%29)* -------------------- Fictional clowns come with a body count. Edgar Allan Poe’s Hop-Frog (1849) was a dwarf forced to be a jester who burned eight courtiers to death. *[11/10/23 2:42 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/436/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/24/2/4/2%5Bc02%5D/182%5Bp75%5D/1%3A0%29)* -------------------- If all the knife-wielding kindergarten kids, psychic preschoolers, and homicidal high-school students from this chapter were in a school picture, The Voice of the Clown (1982) would be the snarling six-year-old standing slightly to the side, staring into the camera, clutching a clown doll. Her name is Laura, and she sees right through you. Whatever tricks you try to make her like you, she and her clown are ready. *[11/10/23 2:43 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/436/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/24/2/4/2%5Bc02%5D/192%5Bp79%5D/2%5Bpage72%5D%3A0%29)* [Nocturnal Revelries Link](https://nocturnalrevelries.com/2020/02/16/the-voice-of-the-clown-brenda-brown-canary/) -------------------- Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to 1984, the year Jack Chick published his infamous anti-RPG (role-playing game) tract Dark Dungeons, claiming that these dice-and-paper games were a gateway to satanism and suicide. *[11/10/23 2:44 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/436/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/24/2/4/2%5Bc02%5D/234%5Bp100%5D/1%3A0%29)* -------------------- Mazes and Monsters is best remembered today for its TV movie adaptation, which aired in 1982 and featured Tom Hanks in his first leading role, as Pardieu the Holy Man, freaking out on the streets of New York before trying to jump off the World Trade Center. *[11/10/23 2:45 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/436/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/24/2/4/2%5Bc02%5D/242%5Bp104%5D/6/1%3A0%29)* -------------------- Scott Gardiner is exactly the kind of kid Jaffe warned us was vulnerable to RPGs’ lurid lure: brilliant, creative, socially awkward, and with a dead dad. He’s also into a truly terrible RPG called Hobgoblin that may be only slightly less ridiculous than Mazes and Monsters. *[11/10/23 2:46 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/436/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/24/2/4/2%5Bc02%5D/248%5Bp107%5D/1%3A12%29)* -------------------- ## Chapter 3: When Animals Attack It was the year punk rock broke: 1974. It was also the year James Herbert published The Rats, which is pretty much the same thing. *[11/10/23 2:47 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/436/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/26/2/4/2%5Bc03%5D/24%5Bp6%5D/1%3A0%29)* -------------------- ## Chapter 4: Real Estate Nightmares It was the decade when everything went to hell—and explains why the haunted-house novel reached critical mass. In The Sentinel (1974), a model moves into a brownstone…from hell. In The Shining (1977), an economically strapped family takes a last-chance job in a hotel…from hell. In The House Next Door (1978), nouveau-riche suburbanites build the contemporary home…from hell. But it all started with Robert Marasco’s Burnt Offerings (1973), a chilling tale about a family who escapes the city to move into a summer rental…from hell. *[11/10/23 2:47 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/436/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/28/2/4/2%5Bc04%5D/14%5Bp2%5D/2%5Bpage105%5D%3A134%29)* -------------------- ## Chapter 5: Weird Science In Little Brother (1983), aliens land on Earth in 1908 and take over the Soviet Union. By 1983 they’ve infiltrated the American market with an iPad-esque toy called the Possum, which beams addictive subliminal messages into the brains of good American kids. *[11/10/23 2:49 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/436/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/30/2/4/2%5Bc05%5D/138%5Bp53%5D/1%3A0%29)* -------------------- ## Chapter 6: Gothic and Romantic The story of the Dollanganger children, locked away by their mother, poisoned by their grandmother, and falling in love with each other, became Flowers in the Attic. Agent Anita Diamant represented the paperback original and her assistant sold it for $7,500 to editor Ann Patty at Pocket Books. Patty’s assessment of the writing was “it may be awful, but it is a style”—she was smart enough to see that it elicited a rabid reaction among female readers. *[11/10/23 2:51 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/436/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/32/2/4/2%5Bc06%5D/30%5Bp9%5D/1%3A404%29)* -------------------- ## Chapter 8: Splatterpunks, Serial Killers, and Super Creeps In 1985, the Parents Music Resource Center (PMRC) issued their “Filthy 15” blacklist of objectionable bands, whose only real effect was to guide curious kids to the smuttiest music on the market. *[11/10/23 2:52 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/436/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/36/2/4/2%5Bc08%5D/20%5Bp5%5D/1%3A99%29)* -------------------- the PMRC publicly demanded that record labels reassess the contracts of musicians who performed violent or sexualized stage shows. They managed to hold Senate hearings on explicit lyrics and “porn rock,” which accomplished little except to show Americans that Twisted Sister’s Dee Snider was more levelheaded and informed than Tipper Gore. *[11/10/23 2:52 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/436/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/36/2/4/2%5Bc08%5D/20%5Bp5%5D/1%3A371%29)* -------------------- The first female character in The Scream is introduced to readers as we’re invited to look up her skirt. The second is “all tits and tan and perfect even teeth.” Then she’s murdered. *[11/10/23 2:53 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/436/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/36/2/4/2%5Bc08%5D/48%5Bp18%5D/1%3A0%29)* -------------------- Fangoria magazine split off the edgier Gorezone, while Fear magazine debuted in the U.K. and soon spun off its own fiction mag, Frighteners. Graham Masterton dominated the first cover of Frighteners with his outrageous cannibal-kid story “Eric the Pie,” which evoked instant outrage. The publisher pulled the magazine from newsstands, and it limped through two more issues before shutting down. *[11/10/23 2:54 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/436/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/36/2/4/2%5Bc08%5D/50%5Bp19%5D/4/1%3A0%29)* -------------------- the first Abyss book, The Cipher by Kathe Koja, hit the racks. A sharply observed slice of early-’90s bohemia, it was about a couple of starving artists in a dying Rust Belt city who find a hole in their storage space. Dubbing it the Funhole (the original title of the book), they discover that anything organic fed into the Funhole comes out disturbingly mutated. So these art scene bottom-feeders use the Funhole to get themselves a gallery show. *[11/10/23 2:55 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/436/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/36/2/4/2%5Bc08%5D/176%5Bp74%5D/1%3A17%29)* -------------------- # The Canadian Mounted: A Trivia Guide to Planes, Trains and Automobiles ## INTRODUCTION: And yes, I know, as Neal Page says, that not everything is an anecdote. I did my best to discriminate and to choose ones that are funny or mildly amusing and interesting. I may even have found some that might be amusing accidentally. *[11/6/23 9:37 AM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/576/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/8/2/4/42/1%3A187%29)* -------------------- ## THE MUSIC The song that eventually became known as the “unofficial” theme of the movie is an instrumental version of “Power to Believe” by The Dream Academy. *[11/6/23 4:07 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/576/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/22/2/4/142/1%3A0%29)* -------------------- # Halloween: Magic, Mystery, and the Macabre ## INTRODUCTION: NEW BOO Until fairly recently, we humans were much closer to nature and our lives far more dependent on the annual cycle of the seasons. For most of the northern hemisphere, autumn meant crops had to be harvested and stored, livestock slaughtered or secured for winter months. Survival during the upcoming darker colder days of winter must be considered and assured. But we couldn’t simply depend on nature, hard work, or even a bountiful harvest when it came to such matters of life-and-death; the season begat celebrations, ceremonies, rituals, religious beliefs, and the working of magic. *[10/30/23 1:59 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/558/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/8/2/4/16/1%3A0%29)* -------------------- # Bloodcurdling Tales of Horror and the Macabre ## Introduction: Heritage of Horror by Robert Bloch “The oldest and strongest emotion of mankind is fear, and the oldest and strongest kind of fear is fear of the unknown.” *[10/25/23 8:11 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/130/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/8/2/4/2%5Bitr%5D/6/1%3A0%29)* -------------------- # The Obesity Code: Unlocking the Secrets of Weight Loss (Why Intermittent Fasting Is the Key to Controlling Your Weight) ## Part Two: The Calorie Deception ### 3: The Calorie-Reduction Error The First Law of Thermodynamics states that energy can neither be created nor destroyed in an isolated system. *[10/20/23 4:04 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/385/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/22/2/4/66/1%3A96%29)* -------------------- If we eat an extra 200 calories today, nothing prevents the body from burning that excess for heat. Or perhaps that extra 200 calories is excreted as stool. Or perhaps the liver uses the extra 200. We obsess about caloric input into the system, but output is far more important. *[10/20/23 4:05 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/385/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/22/2/4/72/1%3A0%29)* -------------------- We certainly don’t mind if energy is burned as heat or used to build new protein, but we do mind if it is deposited as fat. There are an almost infinite number of ways that the body can dissipate excess energy instead of storing it as body fat. *[10/20/23 4:04 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/385/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/22/2/4/78/1%3A0%29)* Not all calories are destined to be fat. Reducing calories also reduces available energy to maintain the body. -------------------- The Biology of Human Starvation *[10/20/23 4:06 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/385/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/22/2/4/98/2/1%3A0%29)* Ancel Key's experiment in restricting calories to lose weight didn't account for the types of calories the participants were eating (heavy carbs) -------------------- The men experienced profound physical and psychological changes. Among the most consistent findings was the constant feeling of cold experienced by the participants. As one explained, “I’m cold. In July I walk downtown on a sunny day with a shirt and sweater to keep me warm. At night my well fed room mate, who isn’t in the experiment, sleeps on top of his sheets but I crawl under two blankets. *[10/20/23 4:07 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/385/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/22/2/4/102/1%3A70%29)* Starvation Diet -------------------- The body reacts in this way—by reducing energy expenditure—because the body is smart and doesn’t want to die. What would happen if the body continued to expend 3000 calories daily while taking in only 1500? Soon fat stores would be burned, then protein stores would be burned, and then you would die *[10/20/23 4:09 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/385/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/22/2/4/112/1%3A0%29)* If you consume fewer calories, your body uses fewer calories. -------------------- If we reduce daily calorie intake by 500 calories, we assume that 1 pound (0.45 kilograms) of fat per week is lost. Does that mean that in 200 weeks, we would lose 200 pounds (91 kilograms) and weigh zero pounds? Of course not. The body must, at some point, reduce its caloric expenditure to meet the lower caloric intake. It just so happens that this adaptation occurs almost immediately and persists long term. *[10/20/23 4:09 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/385/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/22/2/4/118/1%3A86%29)* -------------------- Tired of feeling so lousy, she abandons the failed diet and resumes eating 2000 calories per day. Since her metabolism has slowed to an output of only 1500 calories per day, all her weight comes rushing back—as fat. *[10/20/23 4:10 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/385/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/22/2/4/126/1%3A804%29)* -------------------- ### 4: The Exercise Myth Total energy expenditure = Basal metabolic rate + Thermogenic effect of food + Nonexercise activity thermogenesis + Excess post-exercise oxygen consumption + Exercise *[10/20/23 4:11 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/385/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/24/2/4/48/1%3A0%29)* -------------------- The key point here is that total energy expenditure is not the same as exercise. The overwhelming majority of total energy expenditure is not exercise but the basal metabolic rate: metabolic housekeeping tasks such as breathing, maintaining body temperature, keeping the heart pumping, maintaining the vital organs, brain function, liver function, kidney function, etc. *[10/20/23 4:11 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/385/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/24/2/4/50/1%3A0%29)* -------------------- The thermogenic effect of food is the energy used in digestion and absorption of food energy. Certain foods, such as dietary fat, are easily absorbed and take very little energy to metabolize. Proteins are harder to process and use more energy. *[10/20/23 4:13 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/385/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/24/2/4/58/1%3A176%29)* -------------------- Decreased caloric intake can decrease basal metabolic rate by up to 40 percent. We shall see that increased caloric intake can increase it by 50 percent. *[10/20/23 4:13 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/385/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/24/2/4/60/1%3A476%29)* -------------------- ### 5: The Overfeeding Paradox There appears to be a “set point” for body weight and fatness *[10/20/23 3:56 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/385/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/26/2/4/52/1%3A66%29)* -------------------- Since obesity results from a high body set weight, the treatment for obesity is to lower it. But how do we lower our thermostat? The search for answers would lead to the discovery of leptin. *[10/20/23 3:57 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/385/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/26/2/4/72/1%3A277%29)* -------------------- ## Part Three: A New Model of Obesity ### 6: A New Hope Glycogen is like your wallet. Money goes in and out constantly. The wallet is easily accessible, but can only hold a limited amount of money. Fat, however, is like the money in your bank account. It is harder to access that money, but there is an unlimited storage space for energy there in your account. Like the wallet, glycogen is quickly able to provide glucose to the body. However, the supply of glycogen is limited. Like the bank account, fat stores contain an unlimited amount of energy, but they are harder to access. *[10/20/23 4:14 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/385/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/30/2/4/90/1%3A0%29)* -------------------- Before getting money from the bank, you spend what’s in your wallet first. But you don’t like having an empty wallet. In the same manner, before getting energy from the Fat Bank, you spend the energy in the Glycogen Wallet. But you also don’t like an empty Glycogen Wallet. So you keep the Glycogen Wallet filled, which prevents you from accessing the Fat Bank. *[10/20/23 4:15 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/385/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/30/2/4/92/1%3A88%29)* -------------------- In other words, before you can even begin to burn fat, you start feeling hungry and anxious because your glycogen is becoming depleted. If you continually refill your glycogen stores, you never need to use your fat stores for energy. *[10/20/23 3:57 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/385/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/30/2/4/92/1%3A450%29)* -------------------- ### 8: Cortisol Chronically elevated cortisol leads to increased insulin levels *[10/20/23 3:58 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/385/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/34/2/4/24/1%3A485%29)* -------------------- Stress contains neither calories nor carbohydrates, but can still lead to obesity. Long-term stress leads to long-term elevated cortisol levels, which leads to extra pounds. *[10/20/23 4:15 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/385/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/34/2/4/54/1%3A143%29)* -------------------- ### 9: The Atkins Onslaught As kids, we used to call this the second-stomach phenomenon: after the first stomach for regular food was full, we imagined that there was a second one for desserts. Somehow, despite being full, we still have room for highly refined carbohydrates like cake and pie—but not proteins or fats. Highly refined and processed foods somehow do not trigger the release of satiety hormones, and we go ahead and eat that cake. *[10/20/23 3:58 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/385/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/36/2/4/50/1%3A107%29)* -------------------- Think about foods that people say they’re “addicted” to. Pasta, bread, cookies, chocolate, chips. Notice anything? All are highly refined carbohydrates. Does anybody ever say they are addicted to fish? Apples? Beef? Spinach? Not likely. Those are all delicious foods, but not addictive. *[10/20/23 3:59 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/385/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/36/2/4/52/1%3A0%29)* -------------------- Refined carbohydrates are easy to become addicted to and overeat precisely because there are no natural satiety hormones for refined carbs. The reason, of course, is that refined carbohydrates are not natural foods but are instead highly processed. Their toxicity lies in that processing. *[10/20/23 3:59 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/385/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/36/2/4/54/1%3A272%29)* -------------------- Birthdays, weddings and holiday celebrations—what do we eat? Cake. Ice cream. Pie. Not whey powder shakes and lean pork. Why? Because we want to indulge. The Atkins diet does not allow for this simple fact, and that doomed it to failure. *[10/20/23 4:01 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/385/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/36/2/4/64/1%3A438%29)* Why does Keto fail so often? What if we use Keto temporarily, just to recover from indulgences or to "get back on the wagon"? -------------------- ## Part Five: What's Wrong with Our Diet? ### 14: The Deadly Effects of Fructose Excessive fructose puts significant pressure on the liver since other organs cannot help. It is the difference between pressing down with a hammer and pressing down with a needlepoint: much less pressure is needed if it is all directed onto a single point. *[10/25/23 8:00 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/385/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/50/2/4/74/1%3A0%29)* -------------------- # Wild Blood ## Chapter Three Chapter Three *[10/25/23 2:02 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/359/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/10/2/4/2/2/1%3A0%29)* This chapter is its own short story in Shock Rock Vol 1 - "VARGR Rule" https://www.goodreads.com/en/book/show/641739 -------------------- # Just for Fun: The Story of an Accidental Revolutionary ## VIII From: torvalds@klaava.Helsinki.Fi (Linus Benedict Torvalds) To: Newsgroups: comp.os.inix Subject: What would you like to see most in minix? Summary: small poll for my new operating system Message-ID: <1991Aug25.205708.9541@klaava.Helsinki.Fi> Hello everybody out there using minix-I’m doing a (free) operating system (just a hobby, won’t be big and professional like gnu) for 386 (486) AT clones. This has been brewing since April, and is starting to get ready. I’d like any feedback on things people like/dislike in minix, as my OS resembles it somewhat (same physical layout of the file-system (due to practical reasons) among other things). I’ve currently ported bash (1.08) and gcc (1.40), and things seem to work. This implies that I’ll get something practical within a few months, and I’d like to know what features most people would want. Any suggestions are welcome, but I won’t promise I’ll implement them:-) Linus (torvalds@kruuna.helsinki.fi) PS. Yes-it’s free of any minix code, and it has a multi-threaded fs. It is NOT portable (uses 386 task switching etc.), and it probably never will support anything other than AT-harddisks, as that’s all I have:-(. *[6/10/23 12:51 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/35/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/64/2/4/4/1%3A0%29)* The most famous USENET post in Linux history. -------------------- ## THE MEANING OF LIFE II technology drives nothing. It is society that changes technology, not the other way around. Technology just sets the boundaries for what we can do, and how cheaply we can do it. *[6/26/23 9:20 AM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/35/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/122/2/4/36/1%3A36%29)* -------------------- We don’t communicate more these days because we have the means to do so—we communicate more these days because people are blabbermouths, and they want to communicate; and if the means aren’t there, they will be created. *[6/26/23 9:21 AM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/35/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/122/2/4/38/1%3A209%29)* -------------------- Survival. Your place in the social order. And entertainment. The three things that make us do the things we do. Everything else is what a sociologist would probably call “emergent behavior”—patterns of behavior that emerge from those much simpler rules. *[6/26/23 9:23 AM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/35/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/122/2/4/56/2/1%3A0%29)* -------------------- So what does this all mean? Probably not much. After all, my theory of the meaning of life doesn’t actually guide you in what you should be doing. At most, it says “Yes, you can fight it, but in the end the ultimate goal of life is to have fun.” *[6/26/23 9:31 AM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/35/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/122/2/4/84/1%3A0%29)* -------------------- # It: A Novel ## Part 5: The Ritual of Chüd ### Chapter 22: The Ritual of Chüd Love and Desire/August 10th, 1958 *[9/22/22 7:10 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/229/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/84/2/4/620/2/1%3A0%29)* "That" Scene -------------------- # Time Management for System Administrators: Stop Working Late and Start Working Smart ## Preface important themes: Keep all your time-management stuff in one place. Use your brain for what you are working on right now, and use external storage for everything else. Develop routines for things that happen periodically. Pre-compute decisions by developing habits and mantras. Maintain focus during project time. Improve your social life by applying these tools outside of work, too. *[9/19/22 3:12 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/374/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/10/2/4/2/62/1%3A81%29)* -------------------- ## 1. Time Management Principles ### 1.1. What's So Difficult About Time Management? We lack quality mentoring. SAs need to learn the fundamentals of to do list management, calendar management, and life-goal management just like anyone else. However, our normal career path usually doesn't lend itself to learn these things. Our mentors are technical peers, often on email lists, and often in different parts of the world. There are fewer opportunities to learn by watching, as a supervisor often learns from a director. *[9/22/22 1:05 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/374/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/28/2/4/2/24/16/2/6/2/2/2/1%3A0%29)* Agreed. I've continually found myself in a position of "nobody understands what I do" -------------------- ### 1.2. The Principles of Time Management for SAs One "database" for time management information (use one organizer). *[9/22/22 1:08 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/374/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/30/2/4/2/10/2/2/2/1%3A0%29)* This is much more difficult than originally thought. Especially for a Linux admin in a Windows world. Lots of Open-Source, web-based solutions. -------------------- #### 1.2.2. Conserve Your Brain Power for What's Important Don't take it personally, but your brain isn't as good at recalling things as a piece of paper or a computer. Don't use your brain to track tasks or appointments. Use your organizer, a request-tracking database, a Wiki, or anything other than your brain. *[9/22/22 1:11 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/374/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/30/2/4/2/16/12/1%3A0%29)* -------------------- # Shock Rock II ## Track Eight It was a CD. And it was so hot that he had to juggle it between his hands until it cooled. *[9/19/22 3:22 PM](calibre://view-book/_hex_-63616c696272652d6d6173746572/451/EPUB?open_at=epubcfi%28/48/2/4/370/1%3A0%29)* --------------------